Myths about Rape

A myth is a false idea that many people believe to be true.

In many societies all over the world, people have believed and still believe in myths about what rape is and what causes it. In South Africa, the legal definition of rape has been changed; this means that our law courts now recognise what rape truly is, instead of upholding rape myths (false ideas). Sadly though, many men and women in our country still hold onto harmful myths about rape.

Why are rape myths so harmful?

• Myths lead people to blame women. We think that she was ‘asking to be raped’. Instead of holding the rapist responsible for the rape, we blame the victim. In court, defence lawyers can also use myths to attempt to undermine the testimony of the survivor. This can prevent justice from being done.
• Myths make people doubt what the victim says. We think that ‘she was not really raped’. This can mean that the victim does not get the support she needs from people around her. It can also make officials in the criminal justice system doubt her testimony, preventing justice from being done.
• Myths make rape survivors feel too ashamed or too guilty to report the rape or to share it with friends and family. The survivor ends up isolated and does not get the support she needs to help her recover from the trauma of the rape. Studies estimate that only one in nine survivors report rape. This means that most rapists walk freely among us, unpunished and ready to reoffend.
• Myths hide the fact that a rapist can come from any race, social class or environment. It makes us feel more distrustful or afraid of certain people based on stereotypes and prejudice, not based on the facts of the situation. It makes us believe that we can tell what makes someone a rapist when this is not the case.
• Myths make us believe that we can prevent rape from happening to us. This stops us from addressing the real sources of the problem, for example people’s attitudes to violence and to relationships between men and women, also known as gender relations.

Myths take away the dignity and humanity of the survivor, causing her more trauma and pain and lowering her chances of recovery. Myths also prevent many rapists from being prosecuted. It is vital that all of us in society reject these myths, so that survivors may fully recover and more rapists be convicted.

Note: Many of these myths and facts refer to rape between a man and a woman and the ideas that people have about this. It is important to realise that rape can happen between same sex partners as well and that thinking that rape can only happen between a man and a woman is also a myth. In certain rare instances women have been known to rape men but at Rape Crisis we have found this to be the exception rather than the rule and so we base our comments on rape between a man and a woman realising that each rape is unique even as we generalise about it.

MYTH: A woman who gets drunk is inviting rape.

The truth is that both men and women sometimes get drunk – it is not a crime to drink, it is a crime to rape.

TRUTH: A person that is too drunk might be incapable of consenting to sex; sex without consent is rape.

MYTH: It’s not rape if a woman wears revealing clothing, because then she wants sex.

Sex without consent is always rape, no matter what the circumstances. Just because a woman wears a short skirt or a revealing top does not always mean that she is sending out a signal that she is available for sex. A woman always has the right to choose if, when and with whom she has sex.

TRUTH: When a woman wears revealing clothes she is not actively consenting to sex – she must still be able to deny her consent to sex if she chooses to.

MYTH: Women who wear revealing clothing invite men to rape them.

Appearance and clothing have nothing to do with who gets raped. Women are raped no matter what they wear: babies in nappies, old women in tracksuits and nuns in habits also get raped.

TRUTH: Clothing does not determine who gets raped.

If men are attracted by our curves and breasts then it is not our problem. We will again wear short exposing dresses. If men wants to rape still let them know that their Manhood can also be trimmed for Crissakes!